Ladies and Gentlemen.  I have spent the last few days completing a short story which I have dubbed “Ice.”  Most of you have read them as Minus the Beats.  I have taken a lot of time and sequenced them and created one long story about a man.  A man on a journey to find something within himself.  I will be posting a link to read the story soon on issuu.com.  The link will only include parts 1-8.  They entire collection (1-10) will only be available for purchase.  This is something that has been in the making for about 6 months now and I am pleased to finally put it up for everyone to view. Below is a preview to hopefully get you all hooked.  All parts can be found under the “Featured –> Minus the Beats” section.  Enjoy everyone and a special thanks to Greta Von Voss and Jungle Justine for all your help!

“Ice”

Part 1:

The elevator ride from the top floors of the office building seemed to take a lifetime.  He rolled up his sleeve and looked down at his Rolex, 5:34 pm.  He was draped in an Armani suit, DKNY shoes, and Burberry wool trench coat.  Two men stood to either side of him.  The elevator car slowed as it approached the bottom floor and bobbed to a stop.  The doors opened slowly to the outside world and the man stepped out.  “Don’t forget to take care of Him tonight at the dock’s. Keep it quiet.”  There was no answer.  The man turned back towards the elevator, he was alone.

He could see his breathe and a cold breeze hit him from behind.  The man turned in confusion holding his hand in front of his face.  The lobby was frozen over and the windows broken.  He crossed the threshold and out onto the street.  The light disappeared as if the sun had suddenly set without warning.  The world had gone to hell, if hell was a frozen wasteland.  A singular trashcan, which was on fire, lit the street.   A dark shadow hovered around the outside.

“Hello?” The man called out.

There was no answer.  The man started walking toward the trash barrel.  The dark figure was digging a hole in the ground.  The man stood above the hole and looked down at the dark figure.

“Who are you!? What have you done with everybody!?”

– Tom

Instead mountains of snow we saw the ground virtually the same as it was when we had fallen asleep the night before.  A small dusting had covered the grass, but their really appeared to be no “storm” in sight.  It wasn’t until about 12:30 pm that it started actually snowing hard.  Even then, this “heavy snow” that was forecast had yet to be seen.  I don’t know about y’all, but I enjoy a good snow day and boy was this a disappointment.  A continued to check the forecast and what had originally been 8-12 inches had now been reduced to about 1-2 inches.

I’m not sure that the weather men could have been any more wrong about the weather.  The blizzard to the Northeast, now this is Hartford, CT I’m talking about, had become just another snow squall.  Only this time, since the such severe weather had been predicted business had already shut their doors and turned all their customers away.

*By the way, this Starbucks coffee I am drinking tastes like shit.*

I am currently in need of a calculator so I can figure out exactly how much money the local area businesses lost to this awful weather prediction.  I understand it’s not an exact science, but honestly guys?  Not even close, not one of you realized at some point yesterday that, hey, doesn’t look like this storms going to be as bad as we thought?  Not worth getting my titty in a twist I guess.

Not all was lost on this day, no.  Before this “disaster” struck I was able to pick up Zombieland and Inglorious Basterds.  Two of my favorite movies of 2009.  Woody Harrelson is one funny mo-fo, and not to mention Bill Murray’s cameo.  I will be watching Inglorious Basterds tonight to get my monthly dose of Quentin.  The greatest part of these movies are how unconventional and simple they are made.  Though many people may disagree that Tarantino’s movies are simple, they all convey a very serious and direct story that always comes full circle.  Zombieland takes an age old concept, Zombies, and make’s it into one of the funniest spoofs of its time with an all-star cast and fabulous writing.  Nothing seems forced or overdone in either of the films.

side note: during the credits of Beyond Re-Animator a Rat and a severed Penis do battle.  i dare any movie studio to top that. can’t be done

I walked into work

I wasn’t a jerk.

I did all my work

but didn’t just smirk

at the endless amount that I had.

I couldn’t be phased

For I stayed

The entire day through.

It wasn’t time to work anymore.

Friday was upon me

Now I shouldn’t worry

Tomorrow brings snow and time away.

Shouldn’t be anything special

Tonight’s sleep will be official.

Officially, the beginning of the end.

side note: you slipped, I fell.

I was in the mall the other day and I stepped onto the escalator and began walking down the steps and onto the lower floor.  Then it hit me.  Remember when we were kids and we would literally beg our parents to just let us ride the mechanical steps?  They would sometimes oblige, but for the most part they’d drag us down by our arm and our feet dragging across the metal steps.  It was something about the way the light would occasionally show through the cracks that mesmerized our simple minds, like we were searching for another world.

DANGER! This sign meant nothing to us.  Our favorite bouncy ball could be at the bottom of a pile of butcher knives and we’d still dive in head first after it.  The young, nubile mind is forever learning its surroundings and demands stimuli.  As we age and become “wiser” we feel the need to not interact with our surroundings as much.  Ignorance is bliss becomes our motto.  If it doesn’t bother me, I don’t want to know about it.  As I watch a small boy move back and forth, touching the wall and tree trucks that lined the walk way, it made me miss being a kid, more and more.

Our love for our parents.  As children we are constantly loved by our parents.  They are they to teach us how to be respectable adults so that we can one day do the same for our children.  As we grow up we take it all for granted that they will always have that affection.  The truth is, it’s not that they want to forget us or the love us any less.  They are willing to relinquish control in order for us to become the adult we were meant to be and not they one they want us to be.  The more I want my parents and I talk and watch my half brother and sister grow up in a loving home, the more I realize this.

side note:  what does success mean to you?

I finished Shutter Island! The book is amazing and everyone should see it.  Absolutely amazing, wouldn’t have predicted that ending and now can’t wait to see the movie.

So today I ran into something interesting.  I was making a joke today with someone who frequents my restaurant.  He likes his burger bleeding.  So I said, “‘G’ likes his burger bleeding…Like it’ll probably kick you in the mouth when you bite it.”  His friends, who had been in before, laughed and made their own analogies along with me.  The friend to his right on the other hand stared at me and gave me that, “Umm-do-you-even-know-him?” look.  Or perhaps it was, “Those-aren’t-the-kind-of-jokes-we-make” look.  You know exactly when you receive this kind of luck and there isn’t nothing pleasant about it.  Someone who feels like you have just trespassed on the sacred ground of their friendship.  You no doubt have guessed that it took every inch of me to remain filtered and not call her out on the look.

On the lighter side of the news I was driving home and say a taxi cab in someone’s front lawn.  Yea, someone should tell him that the pick people on the side of the road.  There is no need to come right to do the door.  I hope everyone is alright, but I did chuckle, I won’t lie.

The moon is truly amazing tonight.  I wonder how many stories on the news tomorrow will begin with, “Last nights full moon brings crime to Hartford.”  It makes me laugh whenever they use urban legends for actual news.  It’s like do you honestly believe that the full moon had anything to do with it, or was that your lame attempt at being original?

Bottom line, I’m here to have fun and have a bunch of laughs anything less is a waste of my time.

side note: i saw a person today that was so large that they resembled the Michelin man. just think for a minute at how fat that really is.

side note#2: i love when people complain about something that totally doesn’t matter, like coffee at a restaurant that clearly shouldn’t have coffee.  this isn’t a coffee house, chill out, i’m not about to import kona beans so you can sit there and only drink a half a cup and let the rest get cold.  bad coffee?  hold on let me find someone who gives a crap…nope sorry can’t find ‘em.

side note #3: you can eff off.  i’ll have as many side notes as I damn well please.

side note #4: don’t forget to remind me, not to forget to remind me, to forget that you need to remind me, to forget reminding you….

I don’t really want to use this entry as a sob story, but the fact is, you give credit where credit is due.  No matter what my staff may believe about my thoughts of them, they are some of the best people I’ve worked with.  I’m not sure I’d trade them for anyone else and do not look forward to the day when any of them say their final goodbye.  I would sooner welcome one of my family members moving 5000 miles away.

All this didn’t come to me until I was exiting the building and walking up the street towards my car.  I turned for a second and realized that I was leaving the store in the hands of people I trusted.  People that I knew would get the job done and be ready to go harder and faster the next day.  So for those of you who don’t know and happen to be reading this, thanks for your hard work.

Of course, a special thanks to my Mom who puts up with my bullshit for 24 years now.  No one has gotten it worse that her.  Pops, even though you can’t read this probably, thanks for sticking by as well even being so far away and through all the troubles.  Like Mom, you have always given everything even when you didn’t have it all.  Pete, your the little man, my lil’ bro.  I can thank you for being the exact opposite of me.  He helped balance the Shaggy equation.  The list is endless.

If this bored you then…well I don’t really care, it needed to be said.  2010 is a new year and with a new year comes new beginnings.  No one should go unthanked.

side note: i may or may not be OCD….i’ll have to check again.
current music: Buddy Guy

I had lunch with my mom and uncle today.  We went to an “American Joint” in the center of town.  I chose to inhale the corned beef reuben.  I haven’t seen my mom in a few weeks and my uncle in probably a few months.  It was great catching up with them.

I had two meetings after that, one discussing marketing my restaurant and the other to create a brand new television show.  We are making head way and let’s just say, for now, that it concerns a restaurant.  Studios would be foolish to NOT pick this show up when it’s completed.  Maybe some more details later…can’t divulge any more at this time.

As I left my meeting, I crossed the street and was immediately verbally accosted by some random hero about a situation up the street.  I can see cop cars and a fire truck.  I’m minding my own business and don’t really give a crap about whats going on.  My thought was that the fire alarm went off at the pizza place.  This man informed me that someone was hit by a car on a bike and the guy who hit the biker was the owner of the pizza place.  This guy said his peace, didn’t let me get a word in and continued on his way.  I watched him for a moment as he walked towards the scene.  He stopped everyone in his path to tell them about it.

I worked today. It was my day off, but they needed help any way.  Working in the kitchen isn’t glorious work, but I enjoy hanging with the guys every once and a why and making them laugh.  I can only take the estrogen factory out front so much during the week.  The best part of cooking is seeing what you can actually come up with.  Seeing the finished product and knowing that YOU put your heart and soul into it

Ever try and think about what you did during the day only to find that you can’t remember anything good about it. That’s me right now.  It’s okay some days are just more interesting than others.  I’m feeling a good one for tomorrow.

side note: i hate when people randomly tell me a story and they refer to people that i have never met by name.  the worst part is they don’t preface anything by saying “oh sam, who i met and college and dated for 6 months” It just comes out at as, “yea sam called me yesterday and said we are through”…who the fuck are you talking about? and why do you think i care?

Once I returned to CT from NJ I became even more sick.  Apparently NJ is a very dirty place? Gives you disease? Who knew? On the drive home I called my boss and informed him that I would not be able to make it to work.  He didn’t really need to ask why, he could hear it in my nearly non-existent voice that I was in no shape to be entertaining the general public much less handling their food. Nothing was helping me feel better, finally on the second day I went to the walk-in clinic to find out what the eff was wrong.  “A very bad infection in your throat,” said the doctor. Of course, the only way he determines this is by shining he his flashlight that looks into my throat down into my throat and says “hmm” a few times.  No swabs, or blood samples or anything like that. Well he is the professional, am I right?  Who am I to second guess this fellow.  So he hands me a piece of paper with some scribble on it and what looks to be a signature at the bottom.  This guy could be giving me poison for all I know.  “Take this as directed and you’ll feel better in a few days.” A few days?  Nothing like slow and steady.

The short heavy set chap at the pharmacy was obviously having a great day too.  You know that customer service person who is holding back every thread of hate for the general public.  Thinking that the work he is doing is so below him. That was this guy.  He must of felt that the things that I was asking him to do (Fill prescription and update insurance information) was just too much.  I love it too when the computer malfunctions for a short while and these people actually roll their eyes at it like the computer made a conscious decision to fuck the guy over for those 30 seconds.  My final chuckle comes when everything is finally done, he acts like he wasn’t acting completely irrational this whole time, smiles and says, “have a nice day.”

I’m not one for medicine unless I absolutely have to take it.  I have epilepsy, I NEED to take that medication, but beyond that I almost refuse to take anything else.  I will take the occasional Tylenol if it feels like someone cracked me over the head with a sledge hammer, but that’s it.  Shortly after taking my first does of antibiotics and “cough syrup” I was loopy as hell and immediately fell asleep.

The rest of the days were spent doing laundry, playing Modern Warfare 2 and one day of work.  3 of the most unproductive days of my life and it sucks.  New week, new state of health, new material to write.  I ready….are you?

side note: my dreams continue to rule.  I need to will write about one in the coming days.

If it’s one thing the years have taught me its that driving fast is never a good idea.  I witnessed my first “highway pull over.” Hard to believe I know, but in my almost 8 years of driving, I have never seen someone go speeding past a police officer and then get pulled over.  The speed limit is set for a reason and I have been perfectly content doing that for the past year or so.  Driving down to Jersey on Tuesday evening showed me that most people don’t think that the speed limit is set for any particular reason.  It is more of a suggested rate of travel, not an actual standard.  The GS Parkway was more of a runway for individuals who were no longer driving their cars, but rather piloting their cars at a brisk 85+ mph.  If you really need to get somewhere that fast hire a helicopter or take a plane.  I not really into risking my life every time I want to visit friends because some lunatic teenager in his supped up Honda Accord needs to get to his “boys” house.

Day 13 was filled with sickness.  I felt like absolute hell.  I don’t know where it had come from or anything.  My will to do anything had flat-lined.  So naturally I curled up on the tiniest sofa I could with a blanket and cut some Z’s for an hour or so.

I had 5 Guys (Burgers and Fries) for the first time and I must say I was disappointed.  There were testimonials all over the wall for a burger that wasn’t advertised anywhere.  In the end I payed $9.14 for, what they called, a small cheeseburger, fries and a bottle of water.  The burger was not small at all.  It was a huge sloppy mess that was falling apart in my lap.  I do give them credit though.  They could certainly quench the hunger of the nocturnal stoner looking for a fix at 10:30 pm.

The better part of Wednesday night was also spent hanging out with two friends which I rarely get to see anymore.  We shared laughs, beers and video game controllers the way we used to.  College basketball on one TV, video games on the other, beer at our feet and the random jar of snack food, in this case, peanut butter filled pretzel nuggets.  I missed it.  Day 13 was for sure a day I missed the most.  2010 is a year that will bring a lot of that back.  I want to be here more often, there will definitely be some great stories to tell.

The climax of the evening was back at my good friends house where he proceeded to show everyone how I look when I have my seizure.  If you ever happen to run into my best friend you should ask him about it.  He probably does the impression ever of someone having a Grand Mal seizure.  He’ll also tell you that while I was lying helpless in the hospital bed he took $5 from my wallet to get some food because he had no money.  What a guy right?  I love him for it.

Her and I got a hotel room and packed it in for the night on a king sized bed.  I wasn’t feeling great, down right sick in fact, so it made falling asleep that much easier.

side note: does anyone  else get the urge to pilfer the cleaning lady cart ever?

The quote of the day? I have one of those  today, it’s a bit out of context, but I’m sure you’ll get a kick out of it. “…but the placenta was SHITTY!”  That was the first quote I heard from a third party over video chat.  It was quite possibly the best thing I had ever heard.

I found out what diabetic shoes were today.  Who knew that such a ridiculous thing existed.  Never knew something like that was necessary or even needed to be.  I especially didn’t think that someone needed to wrap their car in an advertisement for it.  Pretty sweet ride.

I happened to put on one of the old Star Trek movies on tonight as well, because I’m a loser like that, and man so fantastically poorly made.  Catch my drift?  Great for its time, but looking back on it now with the capabilities we have today its like watching filmmakers re-invent the wheel.  Old sci-fi movies just don’t cut it with me I guess.  I can watch the Godfather all day or Arsenic and Old Lace, but anything dealing with outer space that isn’t Star Wars or a select few Star Trek films…I’d rather not.

Once again I’d like to ask the Almighty for more hours in the day.  It’s already 11:43 PM and I’m struggling to stay awake.

Tomorrow is Tuesday, of course, and will be my Friday.  I leave for Jersey tomorrow night and will definitely have a good day 12 and 13 to share with you all.  I have been looking over the numbers the past few days and been very happy to see all the support you all have given me.

side note: just as I was going to sleep last night I smashed my head on my night stand…fml